Rise of the Runelords

Dwarven Defensive Training

An Uplifting Primer

and your friend BUCKY THE OTTER present:

Fighting Giants with “The DoCTToR”:
The Five Kings Method for Battling the Big-Boned Menace


“Hello! So you’ve been wondering, ‘what if giants attack my holdfast?’ A good question! Giants are a constant menace. Though slow-witted, feral, bad-smelling, and incapable for sensible stonemasonry, giants are fierce beasts that can pose a threat to even the heartiest clan holding. That is, unless you follow these five sensible steps to preparing for battle against these grizzly sub-human abominations!

Trust “the DoCTToR”s orders and you’ve got a prescription for success!"

“D” is for Dodge
Giants are big and stupid, and their blows are slow and clumsy. If a giant is attacking you, dodge quickly to the left and right to confuse its aim!
“C” is for Crazy Ivan
Giants are stinky and ignorant, and unable to grasp complex tactics. Legendary dwarven general ‘Crazy’ Ivan Stonebreaker innovated the anti-giant tactic of feigning complex tactical repositioning to throw giants into confusion. When under assault, pretend to execute a complex maneuver to disrupt the giant’s targeting!
“T” is for Three-Point
Giants may be murderous non-people, but they are very tall. When a giant attacks, adopt a three-point stance to maximize your innate dwarven center of gravity and turn the giant’s exceptional reach against him!
“T” is for Topsy-Turvy
Giants are slow and lazy, but dwarves are diligent and industrious. Use your superior athleticism to tumble to and fro, and the giant will soon tire in its attempts to strike!
“R” is for Roll
Giants have poor senses, a result of their hideous deformities (deformities that bear witness to their unnatural essence and sub-beastial natures). Famous dwarven siegesmith Baran Boulderbearer pioneered a study of dwarves in motion. He discovered that a dwarf in motion must invariably come to rest; a giant’s slow senses can seldom perceive where. When faced with a giant, roll from west to east whenever able in order to confound the giant’s accuracy!

“Now you’re ready to face down even the deadliest giant the FIVE KINGS way! And tell ’em your old pal BUCKY THE OTTER sent you!”


Dwarves have no idea what otters look like.

Dwarven Defensive Training

It helps balance out their Race Points. They take a -20 to Knowledge Nature Checks involving freshwater mammals.

Dwarven Defensive Training
MysticGundam Cunningdrome

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